“We had a gang called the ‘cobra gang’”, revealed my brother, a very solemn secret, not to be disclosed to everyone. That was during one of our extraordinary moments of sibling camaraderie shared over a cup of a late night coffee. He has not been so candid of late, neither had I, so it felt kind of good. And then it was gone the next morning as we got back to our respective routines.
Growing up, we loose grip of so many things. A movie or a smoke seems so much easier than having a real conversation with your own family members. Coming home from such maddening places a home is supposed to be a respite from all that is crazy outside. Often times, however, it can get pretty exasperating within.
I was detesting myself every moment of the day. What a mess had it become?!!
When I was in school it was somehow considered “cooler” to hang out more with your friends than your mom or dad. As I grew up, that became the norm and even though I tried bridging the colossal gap between them and me, it still remains a mammoth task to be done. Of course we went for our family holidays and the cousins’ wedding et al together, but what lied beneath was a hell lot of pain, anxiety, shame and emotional calamity.
My parents always got me the stuff I wanted, gave me the best of education and taught me all the “good” values but somehow I was always longing for more. It is bad enough being a demanding child, but it gets worse when what you secretly demand for is undivided attention and unvarying interest in the monotony of your existence. But a child is entitled to demand that, right? Or so I thought.
So anyways, the point is how come one drifts so much from one’s own family that what is giving you sleepless night’s borders on being absurdly comic for them? Sure, there’s some disorientation happening along the way…
Anyways, coming back to the “cobra gang”, I myself was a member, (rather ‘president’ :P) of a rather non fierce “tiger club” as a kid. All differences aside, some things just keep you connected as a family. Sometimes, a brother and a sister do the same thing, commit the same stupidity, or similarly aspire of becoming presidents!
Cobra Gangs and Tiger Clubs.
My grandfather was an atheist. In his times, it was no less than a blasphemy to not believe in God. He must have faced many a raised eyebrow just like I do when I confess of being a non believer. Sometimes I like to believe that it came down to me from my grandfather. It gives me a sense of history, a sense of belonging. If its possible to get asthma, it must be possible to get atheism too in your genes!
